stereotypes

I'm letting myself blog this afternoon, despite the mess in the kitchen, because for the first time in weeks, I've succeeded in getting Daniel to nap without resorting to one of two things: 1) waiting until 5:00 when he's so tired he can't walk straight and letting him crash in front of Wallace and Gromit, or 2) packing him in the car with Anya and driving to Starbucks for a much-needed latté and not returning home until they're both asleep. I am a little ashamed of both of these things, but you gotta do whatcha gotta do. And both of those options prevents me from cracking open a bottle of wine at four in the afternoon (which I'll confess to having done a time or two), so there you go.

Anyway, I was watching the final round of a high school concerto competition with MSO (Madison Symphony Orchestra) on public TV the other night. I recognized probably half of the orchestra players on the screen because they are professors at the school of music or students or former students. I was getting a little nostalgic, and I also got to thinking about stereotypes. You've probably heard somebody say something like "Stereotypes exist for a reason; there's usually some truth to them." This statement can be maddeningly ignorant in some cases (like in conversations about racial stereotypes, but let's please not get onto that topic), but when it comes to musicians, there's some truth there.

Here are a few that come to mind:

1) Most tuba players are large males with a laid-back personality and jolly sense of humor.

2) Flute players fall into three categories: ditzy gay men, ditzy girly-girls, and jaded ex-players who leave the flute world for academic fields like musicology.

3) Conductors are assholes.

4) Singers, God love 'em, are high-strung, sensitive divas who always wear scarves because they are cold (even in summer) and who can tell you without missing a beat a half dozen methods of snot-removal in allergy season. They also can't count.

5) Percussionists are very, very cool. Nothing can faze a percussionist. It probably has something to do with all the Steve Reich they play.

6) Early music people have long hair and wear old sandals (except the singers.) They are also extremely nerdy.

7) Except for the scarves and the mucous, violinists are a lot like singers who practice more.

Of course, I could name you several exceptions to each one of these. I know female tuba players, I might know a nice conductor or two. I could probably find you a high-strung percussionist, a stylish early music specialist, and some down-to-earth flutists. But in my experience, a lot of musicians fit the stereotypes.

Including me. You probably notice that I didn't say anything about pianists up there. That's because I'm giving them (us) a whole list:
Pianists are straight-A students.
Pianists are obsessed with practicing.
Pianists who can't hack it as soloists decide to become accompanists because it's "easier."
Pianists who become piano teachers couldn't hack it as soloists, either.

There are some negative stereotypes about piano teachers and accompanists, and I fit a lot of them. Most of us are women. Most of us can't really make a good living teaching and accompanying, but that's okay because we find ourselves husbands with good jobs (and health insurance) so we don't have to worry about it. Most of us have some nurturing instinct that compels us to teach children and work with others to perform. Along with that comes a tendency to fail to assert oneself musically and just go along with the other performer, thus securing the accompanist's position as "second-tier" to the soloist. Lord knows I've done that many times, just to be nice, or because I'm afraid of offending someone or suggesting that my way might be better. That's no good, though, because it's a compromise of standards and in the end, the music suffers. It took me a lot of years of grad school to get over that tendency, and I'm still working on that. (Of course, there's an art to coaching and collaborating, especially with someone who is your musical equal, but that's a whole other blog entry.)

Even though I'm good at what I do, it kind of bugs me that I fit these stereotypes. I wish I didn't have to try so hard to stick up for myself (that goes for life in general, too.) I wish I could theoretically find a job in my field that would pay a decent wage AND come with health insurance so I didn't have to be dependent on Stuart for that (I say "theoretically" because with our kids so little, I'm not looking for a job at all right now and I don't know when I will.) I guess the best way to overcome it is to be the best musician I can be, work hard, play the kind of music that makes people sit up and listen, play it WELL so that people sit up and listen. And also, charge enough to be taken seriously...that's hard, deciding how much you're worth.

Uck, sorry about the rambling post here. I was hoping this would be funnier and more succinct. I guess it's all the sleep issues and sleep deprivation preventing me from being a better blogger.

Anyway, here's my pathetic plea for comments (!): what are the stereotypes you encounter? As musicians? As the people you are? Do you dispute any from the list I've got up there?