dissertation black hole

You know what a black hole is, of course. An area so dense with gravity that even light can not escape, or something to that effect. I think we have quasi-black holes in our lives, like the one in the dryer that eats one sock from every pair, and the one that eats my keys every time I'm running late for something. (That particular one never stays in one place, somehow.) These days I'm experiencing the dissertation black hole, where no matter how much time I spend working on this paper, it doesn't get much better. Sure, it's getting longer, but there's hardly anything in there I would consider worthy of someone else reading, let alone a doctoral committee. The dissertation black hole is sucking up my time and energy and effort without offering anything in return (like quality academic writing), and with no regard for my imminent deadline.

Ah, well. Is there anyone out there who enjoys writing their dissertation? If so, I haven't met you yet. And by the way, if your dissertation was so much fun the proverbial barrel of monkeys pales in comparison, you might not want to tell me about it just now because I'm just not in the mood.

At least being pregnant is preventing me from drinking bucketloads of coffee every night to work on it.