back to normal

Stuart took the last few weeks off work, basically the whole month of April. He's been accruing vacation time, we wanted to travel and see our brothers and also spend some good quality family time together (the 4 of us) since the last few years have been so hectic with one or the other being in grad school or taking classes at the it a sabbatical, a time of rest and relaxation. Well, as much as one can rest and relax with two busy little children to keep you occupied, anyway. This is why we were able to have a picnic on the beach at a nearby state park on a Tuesday morning, and go to Milwaukee in the middle of the week on a whim.

Alas, this time has come to a close. Tomorrow, life goes back to normal. Stuart goes back to work, and I go back to paying out the nose for sitters to play with the kids so I can pretend to maintain a sense of balance with family life and "work" life. (I use the quote marks because by the time I pay sitters I'm not even making money, though I hasten to add our sitters are wonderful people and the kids love them and they deserve every cent and probably's just not fair that my career means so little in terms of our finances, that's all).

I admit I'm apprehensive. It was so nice having Stuart at home. We went on little trips to the park together, took bike rides together (which reminds me I still need to get a picture of Daniel on that tag-along bike), and best of all, I had a grown-up around to talk to. I have several friends in town, some of them moms, so it's not like I'm totally isolated, but this is different, of course. And Stuart got a taste - just a little itty bitty nibble, mind you - of what I do at home day in and day out. I still did most of the cooking and cleaning just because I'm used to it and I've gotten pretty efficient. But he at least knows now what it's like to be with the kids all. day. long. through good moments and bad.

Starting tomorrow, I will be doing this by myself again, at least for the ten or so hours a day that Stuart is away at work. I admit I'm having just a bit of anxiety about it. I know I can handle it, but the kids will have to adjust, too. Daniel and Anya are both pretty good about adjusting to change (Daniel especially), but they are still affected by it, and there will be some emotional backlash, I'm sure, and because I am The Mom, I will have to take the brunt of it. It's okay. I can cope. But it will take work. I need to keep us busy enough so boredom doesn't set in. With boredom comes whining, you see, LOTS of whining, and that frays my patience faster than anything. I also need to find my happy place, that mythical, hypothetical spot I go in my mind when things get rough.


Jessi said…
Oh, how I respond to that last paragraph... I had a very rainy weekend and two very cranky, whiney, bored kids. I get it. I sooo get it.

Popular Posts